In 2014, I purchased a single roll of the utterly fabulous and now globally famous 1970s peacock wallpaper by Van Luit.

In 2015, I purchased three more rolls, but in a different color way. Thus, I had four rolls, enough (I guessed) to do the whole bathroom. Did I care about the different color ways? Nope.

 

 

 

My last report on the wallpaper was in December, 2022, when I sadly announced that the ‘blue’ roll appeared to have been…gasp!…purloined.

I know! Shocking!

A few weeks later, while showering, this popped into my head: Check the powder room. This was conveyed in a if you build it, he will come kinda voice.

Check for what though?

Oh…I knew. I knew.

This irritated me as I had already gone through the small room three times. The purloined paper was not there.

However, I learned long ago never to argue with if you build it, he will come kinda voices.

 

In 2014 I gutted the powder room (due to massive termite damage) and removed the marble wainscoting, which was stored in various places ever since.

After Cody left in March, 2022, I stopped working on the carriage house and refocused my attentions on the big house. Over the ensuing months Justin and I hauled the huge marble slabs back into the powder room.

Later, when I began work on the South Hall, I shifted items from the hall to the powder room, including a door, trim bits, and other items.

Later, upon realized that the ‘blue’ paper was missing, I scoured the house for it.

Then…the voice.

 

I had already looked behind the stored door, stored trim bits, and other stored items. No roll of wallpaper.

But…the voice.

As soon as I arrived at the house, I marched right to the powder room. Again, I looked behind the stored door, stored trim bits, and other stored items. Still nothing.

But…the voice.

So I looked again. Still nothing.

But…the voice.

I sighed. And, just as I began to turn away, I glanced at some trim vertically stacked trim in the SE corner. I had not yet ever looked behind it.

A chill tingled my spine.

Surely though the paper was not buried behind the trim?

But…the voice.

I moved the trim. And my eyes grew enormous at the sight of…yes, you guessed it…a single roll of wallpaper, vertically leaning in the corner.

I teared up.

And blessed the voice.

 

An hour later Barb stopped by. She asked about the peacock wallpaper. How though could I update her? Or anybody? I felt such a fool.

But, Ross being, well, Ross, he told. Damn Ross. And he even showed Barb the trim in the corner.

“The paper was behind the trim?”

I nodded.

“But that’s sooooooo not something you’d do.”

I laughed! “I had the same thought! I would never have stuck such emotionally valuable paper behind some trim. Never!”

Yet, I had no answer to the mystery. Nor did Barb. The Twilight Zone theme song went through my head.

 

Last December, I had written that the paper seemingly vanishing “was not a theft, but an act of aggression.”

While it is possible that I had just thoughtlessly left the paper in the corner, and then stupidly buried it, this seems unlikely to the extreme. But it is possible.

Well…no matter. The purloined paper was never actually purloined. It was just on an adventure.

 

This though…drum roll, please…is not the end of the peacock paper story. Remember, this is a tale in two parts.

Fasten your seatbelts.

Get out some wine.

And then scroll down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Y’all know Mary. She comments as Mlaiuppa. Last week she emailed me, with an attached link to eBay. I clicked on the link, STAT. A new window opened. And I gasped!

There was another roll of you-know what!

Squee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My heart though sank like a stone. It had been a Buy It Now. And was…fuck!…already sold.

FUCK!

I returned to Mary’s email to let her know the tragic news. Only then did I fully read the email.

Oh. She had purchased the roll for the Cross House, afraid that somebody else might buy it before I had the chance to see the email.

And today?

 

 

So, a seemingly tragic tale has a happy ending. A double-whammy happy ending.

Thank you, voices.

Thank you, Mary.