The Cross House
Jill and I went upstairs and she showed me something which was a concern, and asked what she should do. I knew just the person who could help and texted her the contact number.
As we chatted my eye glanced at something which made my heart stop.
I AM FREAKIN’ OUT!!!!!!!!
(Scroll way down…)
I was gobsmacked. Intense yearning rose in my heart. I am pretty sure I was drooling.
I stared and stared at this object of great beauty. I caressed the smooth marble. I admired the shapely legs.
Yearning. Desire. L U S T!!!!!!!!
I turned back to Jill and said: “Wow. Weird. I just received a, ah, intuitive message!”
Jill looked at me curiously.
“Yea. And it said, ah, really clearly, that this vanity, umm, used to be in Cross House! But..but…it was STOLEN at some point! So, I think the right thing, ah, is for you to give it back!”
Jill looked at me, unimpressed. “No.”
I turned back to the vanity and resumed caressing. Another ingenious plan then popped into my head!
While gently, loving continuing my caresses, I looked at the marble vanity…and…proposed. “Would you marry me? And come home with me?”
I was desperate, man! Desperate!
Alas though, the vanity remained silent.
And so, with a heavy heart, I soon departed.