My Most Shocking Post
This is a shocking post. Really.
This is a post I never thought I would write.
This is the hardest post I have ever written.
Scroll down. But you will need some wine first.
I’m going to put the Cross House and Carriage House up for sale.
I want to cry just writing that.
But I feel like I have no choice.
NOTE: There is an important caveat at the bottom of this post.
Scroll down.
I am exhausted by endless worries about money. I have always made it clear that I was not rich. In 2018 I posted about a possible way to afford the house. A short while later I gave up on the plan (although not entirely*) as it was so at odds with how I wanted to live in the house. *I still though planned to turn the Octagon Suite and Third Floor into airbnb units.
Then I thought, initially, that Covid would destroy me but it proved a financial Godsend as people across the land worked to make their homes better. So, when the crisis lifted I worried. But my numbers just returned to pre-Covid levels. Which was sustainable. Just.
But 2025? I have been in a state of shock at how much my sales have slumped. June was my worst month ever, and I have had the business since 2006. I just squeaked through July. August was another scary month. This is unsustainable. It seems that the entire nation is afraid to spend money; I cannot find any other explanation.
(Note: I agonized over getting the stone sink and ended up putting it on a credit card (big ouch). I ordered the sink in March. I would soooooooo have not done that even a month later.)
Recently I learned that the Cross House needed new boilers and was quoted $35K. I freaked out. How could I possibly get my hands on that much money?
It developed that I could, maybe, refinance the house. This shot me into a state of euphoria, and that is when I gave Justin a go-ahead to do two weeks of work (including ceilings in the kitchen and entry, and I also asked Modern Air for a formal boiler estimate). I crash landed…hard…when the refinancing possibility never went anywhere. Golly, that was a few painful weeks. I went from breathless anticipation to dashed upon the rocks of despair (did I just write that?)
When the formal boiler estimate came in at $22K, it no longer mattered. While $22K was a lot better than $35K, I could not afford either.
And all this sent me into a dangerous funk.
In talking with Dr. Doug he said: “I have an idea which will make you gasp but maybe you should think about it.”
Nervously, I asked: “Go ahead.” I hope y’all appreciate my great bravery.
“You should sell the Cross properties. You’re too old for all this. Your life would get MUCH better.”
The idea felt like a punch in the stomach. Or, lower. Intuitively though, I could sense something powerful and wise in the idea.
Days passed and I felt like I wanted to vomit from worry and stress. But the idea grew in my mind and culminated in a single thought:
I need to sell the house before I get foreclosed upon.
I need to sell the house before I get foreclosed upon.
I need to sell the house before I get foreclosed upon.
If I can sell the house (a big if) I may net enough to assist with my retirement. If the bank sells it they will likely only ask enough to cover the mortgage. In short, the two properties would be a steal, and I would get nothing.
My overarching goal is thus: I need to stay afloat long enough to get the house sold.
Can I do this? I do not know although I am currently not in trouble. But two months from now? Four months?
OPTIONS:
I have another house I have never mentioned. It is 20 miles due south of where I live, and in a tiny town called Matfield Green. It is called the Tin House, and I worked on it a lot since its purchase in 1998 but have done utterly nothing since being all-consumed by the Cross House in 2014.
The house is gutted to the studs but has a new roof and gutters, new buried electric, new electrical panel, a working septic system, and cold water. It is also damn cute. People love it.
My plan is to, next month, hopefully come up with like $2K to hire Justin for a week to work on the house with me (he would mostly hack down all the wild overgrowth and haul it away). I would clean clean clean. When finished I will list the house for sale for $22.5 (which is the cash I put in it). While Matfield is a speck of a town, its has become sorta cool and has attracted artists and creative types. Think a petite Marfa, TX. And, houses rarely come up for sale.
My other Stay-Afloat-Plan is to sell my 2021 Toyota Sienna Hybrid. If I can get the Blue Book value I can pay off the note and net around $14K. This will buy me a few more months. I would also, of course, need to buy another car but am looking at cars that cost about half the Toyota, or less.
I have been working hard to increase my lighting inventory (more lights available = more sales) and am now up to 322, up from a low of like 270.
And, there are important reasons other than just financial.
Scroll down.
AGE
I will be 69 in February. And long-term readers will recall my terrifying health scare in 2022. Some readers may also recall my 2024 post about the death of Super Ross and his replacement with Slow-Motion Ross:
It is now a decade since I purchased a Titanic-sized 1894 house in Emporia. I was 57 then; 67 now. But, boy oh boy, how things have changed during these years. I am not the man I was. Vital Ross is no longer, and what used to be effortless is now a struggle.
Today, I would never undertake something like a Titanic-sized 1894 house. It has been a painful realization that Vital Ross has been permanently replaced by Slow-Motion Ross. This is not something I ever anticipated. My great energy was always, you know, just there. It was like breathing, a given. I had known, of course, that I would have less strength as I got older. It just never occurred to me that my energy would also largely vanish.
All this year, as I walk though the many rooms of the Cross House, I have experienced the sickening, dawning awareness that I, almost certainly, will not have the energy to finish the work so gloriously begun in 2014.
I will miss the library the most.
BEING SINGLE
When I purchased the house in 2014, I had the distinct sense that the house and blog would attract a partner into my life. Yet, I am still single and the Cross House is simply too huge for one person. When I think about it seems utterly insane that I only now really get this.
IN RETROSPECT
Today, with all that I now know, I wish I had never purchased the Cross Properties. I never felt this before. The regret has been sudden and acute.
I repeat: The regret has been sudden and acute.
That said, while my stress levels have been super high over the years as a result, the project has been an incredible and often joyous roller-coaster ride. Golly, I did what?????? And what I did accomplish has brought me immense pride.
2017 was the best year of my life, and almost entirely due to the work done on the Cross House. I was able to finish the Great North Wall, and ‘enhanced’ the exterior color scheme, which proved incredibly nourishing. I also decorated the parlor, which was a vastly thrilling roller-coaster ride.
Restoring all 43 stained-glass windows in the house is one of my proudest-ever achievements.
When I review this blog post, I am gobsmacked (and damn proud) at what I have accomplished.
Another profound bonus has been meeting y’all. I read every comment and am often touched by the generosity and support. I will continue blogging about lights and other projects (see below), so will not vanish entirely.
ONE MORE THING?
Ya”ll were very generous in funding the cat fence. But now, my cats will never experience a day of it. I have some ideas of how to resolve the karmic issue here and will post my thoughts at a later date.
CAVEAT
PART I:
I have no confidence that the Cross Properties will sell quickly. Huge very old houses needing a lot of work never sell quickly. They also never sell for anywhere near their initial asking price.
The Cross House was listed for sale in 2010 for $215K. Way less than Bob Rodak had put into it.
In 2011 the price was reduced to $180K.
In 2013 the price dropped three times, from $120K to $115K. Bob then dropped the price down to $65K for me. I had not asked for this.
This is a fabulous, to-die-for house in Ft. Scott Kansas, listed on Old House Dreams:
812 S National Ave, Fort Scott, KS
Yet, for all its glory, and being in move-in condition, the house sat and sat and sat on the market. In 2010, the price was $525K. Over the years the price kept dropping, down to (from what I can tell) $239K. It sold, at last, in 2015 (I do not know the sale price). It sold five years after being listed.
For me, in buying the Cross House in 2014, the Ft. Scott house became my cautionary tale: This will be my future regarding the Cross House.
Thus, I have no expectation of the Cross Properties selling quickly. But I need quick. Which brings us to Part II.
PART II:
Y’all know about The Other House which I have posted about. This is where I have lived since 1996. It needs a lot of work but nowhere near the work required to finish the Cross Properties. While the latter seems like an impossibility, the former is actually doable, and for not too much money.
The Other House, when finished, will actually be a desirable property, and should be sellable within a reasonable timeframe, I feel. Indeed, I sense that it will sell quickly. Dr. Doug agrees with me on this. The kitchen is…at long last…finished and a glory. See here.
I feel like I can get the house finished and listed in 2026. And here is the caveat: If The Other House sells before the Cross House, I will take the latter off the market and move into it. In short, I am leaving it up to the Universe to decide my future. An important aspect of this plan is that it will void year and years of anxiety waiting for the Cross properties to sell.
In short, everything might just work out. Might being the operative word.
NOTE: Important update, here.
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You’ve been such an inspiration to me and I have loved following your posts. I am deeply sympathetic with you and your decision to sell the properties. I mourn with you and send you strength to continue on. Your humor, your talent, your patented “baby step” process (which I am using for cleaning up my craft room and the rest of my burrow), your cat love–you will prevail, Ross. I wish you the best of everything and look forward to hearing from you when you crawl out from under this burden. It may urge us (my family) to deal with the great love of our family–a house in Santa Cruz, CA, right on the beach. We’ve fixed it up, we’ve rented it, we’ve time-shared our own family members–it is too much. We’re not there, yet, but I think we will be there before trump is finished with his reign of terror. Much love to you.
Thank you, Susy. Your kind words are much appreciated. BIG hug, Ross
I am so sorry to read this BUT I am also not surprised. With you doing so much of the work on your own I did not really think you would ever get is all done. The main reason is the work you would have to repeat due to time-damage done by water and sun that cannot be prevented 🙁 HUGS to you!
Thank you, Kim. Yes, last year when I spent months and months redoing work completed in 2014/2015 was a real eye-opener. Scary, too!
I am playing the Ohio lottery tonight. 1.8B, would that help?
I worry about you, Ross. You have been a fantastic inspiration to me.
Blair! I was sooooo looking forward to working with you to install the annunciator system! And, yes, $1.8B might help!
Ross, I have loved your story for years and years. I think there may be another option for you. There is an absolute CRAZE on YouTube for old house restorations here in the US and abroad. People with successful channels are raking in vast amounts of money that pays for their life and their projects.
I really think you should consider this. Just know that it all depends on your charm in communicating in video. I feel that you have the requisite charm, and you have so many things you could share. Not just Cross House, but the lighting fixtures, the yachts, your history.
Some examples: look these up on YouTube: The Chateau Diaries; The Pethericks; Escape to Rural France; Tokyo Llama. These are all channels that make serious money from views, Patreon, and sponsorships.
I know it’s really hard to come up with new money after a certain age. I’m 72 and I totally understand how your body can suddenly betray you.
I’m just one of those people who have watched and cared for you for years, from a silent distance. I wish the very best for you.
Kind regards,
Roberta
Sacramento, CA
Roberta, I have spent years thinking about starting a YouTube channel but always hit the same wall: no extra time. And creating a single video takes time, about 40 hours a week from what I can tell. Handsome Dan clearly was not taking 40 hours for his countless brief videos so I wondered if I could possibly do same.
If Stephanie at the Chateau Diaries can edit a 10-15 min video every day you can do one a month. Once you get better at it maybe one a week. I’m talking a light fixture repair video. You could just film yourself while talking about what you’re doing and maybe some history on the company and where you got it, etc. And once you’ve restored it, a before and after and then a link to the light in case anyone wants to purchase it. It might serve to pick up business for your company.
Yeah, there’s a learning curve but you’ll get better and faster at it. Consider it just part of your “business” time along with repairing your lamps.
I agree.
I also watch ATrestoration. It’s furniture restoration but I think there would be an interest in watching Ross restore one of his lighting fixtures, plus a link to buy said fixture would also light a fire under his business. Yes, the economy sucks but I’m sure business would pick up with wider exposure.
Absolutely the hardest post ever….but also the bravest!
I’m sure I won’t be the only one to say it breaks my heart reading this.
But the right decision can often be the hardest one, and this seems like it might be just that.
Just remember, Baby Step will get you where you need to be!
BIG hug, JR.
I am so sorry to hear this, Ross, but I totally understand. I am 77 and completely restored a Portland bungalow from 1996 to 2006. I could not do it again. I’ve worried about your health in every post. I understand the financial panic, too, having gone through a (fortunately short) period of being almost homeless and jobless. My best to you. I am one of the people who sent money for the cat fence, but I don’t want it back. Just send good thoughts my way. I wish you luck whichever way you decide to go.
Thank you, Karen. As mentioned in my caveat, I might, in the end, use the cat fence as intended. It’s all up to the Gods!
Hi Ross,
I’ve followed you for gosh… 8 or 9 years?! I was barely 20 then, and now Im 28 and Ive read every single one of your house, lights and other blog posts! My favorites are from when you talked about your past life adventures. You’re a great writer and I will continue to read about everything you’re doing. I think Dr. Doug is right, this will do you a world of good and you should know you are super brave and powerful for being able to move on from this property. As someone who has followed you for so long Im feeling this super hard, I mean I basically grew up reading you and the house grow. Before the pandemic I dreamed of owning my own Old House, but I gradually have realized it realistically will never happen due to the housing shortage and prices being over double what they were before for even the most basic boring shack. I’ve made peace with this and in fact it feels freeing. I guess that’s just part of growing up. So I think you will feel a great weight come off your shoulders you didn’t know you were carrying after all is said and done (wherever this leads) and you might be amazed at how high you will be able to leap after!
PS – If anyone has been thinking about it, go buy some Lights from Ross’ store now, they are so amazing!
Thank you, Alex. I loved learning a bit about your story!
Oh Ross, I am so sorry you’re dealing with so much stress and angst. I’ve been following your blog for years now, and have always been both amazed and impressed at the amount of work you’ve taken on. You’ve done so many incredible things for the Cross House (the facade! Restoring so much of the trim! The windows!!). But seeing how difficult it’s gotten, I think it’s completely understandable that you have to try selling the Cross and Carriage Houses.
Your Other House is gorgeous, so while it seems likely it will go first, I almost hope it doesn’t. The Cross and Carriage Houses are a huge amount of work, and will continue to be massive projects for a long while yet. And as much as I and your other loyal readers want to continue seeing the amazing things you’re doing with them, I would hate for you to continue feeling regret and stress to do so.
The only suggestion I have, which I know others have mentioned in the past, is to find some way to film your work. I think you would be stunned at how quickly you would go viral on platforms like YouTube, and may find a surprisingly steady income source as a result. Perhaps a local young person could help? I know, it’s a lot to even consider, so I understand why you don’t have the bandwidth for it.
I hope things work out for you in the best possible way. I’ll keep my fingers and toes crossed for you.
Thank you, Nicole. I reached out to the local college to see if anybody could create videos but nothing came of my efforts.
Try the local high schools.
As many will be sad to no longer see the progress being made on the Cross House, most will understand your decision. It has been a pleasure to watch you bring the house back to life. I have to thank Kenny for telling me about it so I have been able to follow along these past several years. I wish you nothing but the best and hope you are able to sell and enjoy some of your ‘golden’ years. Best of luck and keep us posted.
Thank you, June.
Oh, Ross. My heart is just breaking for you. This is such a difficult decision. You’ve absolutely saved the Cross House from certain ruin. I was hoping you’d get to live in it and enjoy those beautiful windows and rooms all day, every day.
I’m going to sit on saying anything else right now, except this: I love you, buddy. And I trust you to make the decision that’s right for you. And you matter infinitely more than a house.
Barb! I would not have met you but for the Cross House. BIG hug! Ross
Well shoot I hated to read this. The universe is funny and scary at the same time. You have endured a lot in your life and have always pulled through. This challenge will be no different.
Thank you, Dennis. While 2017 proved my best-ever year, 2025 has…so far…proved about my worst. Ross is NOT having a good time. Thank goodness for kitties!
I am so sorry you’ve been put in this position. I have enjoyed reading all your posts and seeing the remarkable work you’ve put into Cross house and its carriage house. I hope one day you’ll write a book of all your experiences. I think you’re a great writer, your political posts are the best I’ve read. Good luck in the future and take care of your health, that’s the most important thing. I will continue to read anything you want to write about,
Thank you, Bonnie. I wanted to write a book about the house but, tragically, my editor and friend died!
This doesn’t surprise me after the slowed posts of late, but it does sadden me. I know you got the Heritage Grants, but I wish this country valued it’s architectural history more. It is criminal that for all the work you’ve done and for how gorgeous that house is it will probably sell in the $200k range. I do think it is wise to put some of the properties on the market–selfishly I hope the universe sells the other places and you can keep the Cross House. I’ll certainly be sending you good wishes!
Thank you, Alice. I’m struggling to ascertain the value of the Cross Properties. Love is what will sell the Cross House. I fell in love with the house, as did the previous owner.
When I saw the title of your post I just knew… I’m so sorry. Following your successes and set backs has been so wonderful. I so understand your decision, especially the health considerations – that is something that is insurmountable, I know first hand. I will keep you in my prayers that the right things happen to enrich you. Please take care of yourself.
Thank you, Laurie.
Our admiration for you only increases over time. We will love you no matter where you live or whatever the circumstances. You have made a positive difference in so many ways, and we know you will continue to do so for a long time.
Linda, thank you for the kind words.
Ross, I’ve followed for a long time. This is not a surprise. However, it is massively sad. I’m hoping your place sells first. I thought when you were going to do youtube it would have turned things around. I still feel it would.
At any rate I wish you all the very best no matter what happens. I will miss not seeing the end results to the Cross properties.
All the best
I agree YouTube would have made him lots of money. The whole world sits at home watching people in France do houses and shadows because no one in America really puts it on YouTube.
Hi, Dan! You might still see the end results! It’s all kinda up to the Gods what happens.
Ross, I am right there with you. I had put a hold on working on my old Victorian house 13 years ago when I adopted my sister’s grandkids who needed a home. This summer was when I was going to be able to get back to working on it! They are now both adults, although one is still finishing up high school this year. But it is not to be. I am in the process of being diagnosed with ALS. It takes a while to get the official diagnosis, but the fact is that my symptoms don’t match anything else. So I only have 2-5 years left, and will progressively become completely paralyzed as I lose strength. It is heartbreaking to not be able to fulfill goals, but sometimes we have no choice. So now I am deconstructing my life, giving away all the things I had gotten for my home. Finding homes for all the cats in my rescue (and two dogs). It is really hard. I thought I had a good home for one of my cats, but it didn’t work out, and I had to get him back. So I have only been able to rehome one dog and one cat so far. It is breaking my heart. My heart breaks for you, although I still hold out hope you may be able to pull through.
Oh, Miriam, you really need a BIG BIG BIG hug! Much love, Ross
Thank you Ross. I need them.
Miriam: My thought are with utopia as you navigate your diagnosis. Sending love and prayers from one Friend of Ross to another.
Urgh. The typos! This should have said: My thoughts are with you as you navigate this diagnosis. Sending love and prayers from one Friend of Ross to another.
I just assumed you were drunk, Barb!
I am so sorry and as soon as disheartened by your sad news. Hugs and prayers for you. Please keep us all posted on you and your trials. Lots of hugs!
Thank you, Sandra.
I am cheering for the cross house. It still need you. You’re very wise and or one of the few people who could direct a project this large and not make it ghetto. You need to buy me a coffee or some thing so people can send you some funds to get your confidence back up
Harlan, confidence isn’t really an issue here.
I’ve been following your blog since the beginning and rarely comment, but I felt compelled to say something here.
My heart truly breaks for you having to face this. Times like this make me wish I had the means to throw money at people like you, because homes like the Cross House are rare treasures, and future generations deserve to see them preserved. Your passion and dedication have always shone through, and it’s been inspiring to watch.
From other restoration projects I’ve followed, I’ve noticed that a big part of the process often involves showcasing on social media—it not only shares the journey but can also provide support. Of course, most of those people either have a partner helping behind the scenes or hire social media managers. You’ve faced harder odds and still persevered, and you should be very proud of how much you’ve accomplished, Ross.
I do hope you might consider reaching out to organizations or companies that specialize in historic homes. Maybe, just maybe, it could end up with someone who loves it as deeply as you do.
To me, having the courage to accept that selling might be necessary—before it ever gets to the bank—is an act of strength, not defeat. You’ve been such an inspiration, and I still dream of one day owning a Cross House of my own.
Please take care of yourself, Ross. I’m wishing the best for you and for the beautiful Cross House..
Thank you, Leo. BIG hug! Ross
Things have a way of working out, especially if you are flexible and unattached to a particular outcome. Harmonize with the universe and all will be well. Sometimes our myopia prevents us from seeing the path of our longer journey.
Wise advice, John! And I agree.
Yeah! What Jon said! Of course your health is the top priority, my friend. I have more to say about how the mind/body connection works, but I might choose to do that on the phone. Sending you love, peace, courage and gratitude.
The house is pretty famous in the old house community; hopefully that will be a huge help in finding an appropriate buyer! I know I’d take over the project if I could. Blessings on all your plans.
Thank you, Bethany. Yes, the Cross House is well known but will that help me find a buyer? I don’t know but time will tell!
Your blog has been a constant source of enjoyment for me over these may years! It is strange – I feel like we are good friends, and we have never met.
I was in a slightly similar spot in around 2012. I ended up with two houses and could only afford one. The stress was really tough and awful. I put both on the market and waited for the fates to weigh in! I ended up in the house I really wanted (the one that took forever, which for me was 13 months, to fix – and was an FHA 203k rehab, it’s own special form of hell.) None of my neighbors of friends could really understand what I was doing, but I felt it was the only option to keep afloat.
I hope the other house sells well and for a very high number! Either way, I hope you will continue to share your life and thoughts on this blog.
Your friend in Chicago.
Thanks for sharing your story, Derek, my friend in Chicago.
I will still be blogging!
Oh Ross, my dear friend and dear wonderful human being……….this post truly hurts my heart for you, and for Cross House. I am truly saddened that you are under such financial stress and having been there myself for way too long I know how exhausting & frightening it is to live like this. It’s too much.
So yes – it’s clearly time to lessen the stress load upon you, for sure, and I am proud of you for recognizing this. I have wondered why your posts have become so infrequent and I’ve missed you, and them…….I have read your blog since you started it and have deeply enjoyed your engaging writing… and every single one of your political posts were like a light shining out to me – in all this current madness & darkness & insanity. I have learned so so much from you and am immensely proud of and absolutely admire your commitment to doing quality beautiful work – I have always cheered you on from my 1904 home in rural northern MN and have always hoped that you were & are well, even though I rarely commented…..I hope that something sells quickly for a good price to reduce some of this $$ pressure for you, and I also hope that you will continue to be healthy & feisty & as wonderful as you are. Much love and admiration to you, good sir. Well done Ross, well done.
Dear Sandra, thank you for the kind words. It’s going to be interesting to see which property sells first! Because that will decide much for me!
I will still blog about light, kitties, the Tin House in Matfield, and The Other House.
Perhaps raffle off the house. I read an article yesterday about a couple who are raffling off their dream property of 80ish acres west of Dallas. It was set up that if the preset minimum amount of tickets, $7.00 each, were sold the person who won the raffle would have a choice of the property or 1/2 of of the money raised…….there were a few other stipulations but who knows it may be an option………I’d buy a ticket for $10.00. I hope it all works out the best for you.
Hi Ross,
I think you are wise in putting both up and having the fates weigh the scales. As you said, regardless of what happens after now, everything you have done for the house thus far has been an astounding achievement. Your blogs have been a stabilizing calm in the torrent of this current world. I hope your plans and finances work out okay, and I hope you end up somewhere that is better for your mental health. Even a gorgeous dame such as the Cross house is not worth such fretting.
Thank you, JP.
Ross, I can only imagine how hard this is for you. I have followed you for years and will never cease to be amazed at how you saved the Cross House. I have cheered every victory, lamented setbacks, and always left amazed at your talent! Your attention to detail was so fulfilling to see! I enjoy your writing so much and will miss that almost as much as the actual house restoration. Thank you so much for letting us all live vicariously through you. Yes, age does make a difference, especially with something this enormous. You have done an amazing job as caretaker of the Cross House. What you have accomplished is nothing short of miraculous. I know you will do what you must, whatever that will be, and you will find new paths to fulfillment. You are a treasure!
Hi, Wenda! Be assured, I’m not vanishing, I just won’t be writing about the Cross Properties.
Oh dear oh dear, this is heartbreaking! I think what would help is a pros and cons of the process with which to go about this since it’s so complex. Dr. Doug is right the Cross House properties are such a gargantuan task. It’s like a bottomless pit in spite of all your efforts.It’s like two steps forward one step back. You are gettingold and your health is not going to allow for this to continue. Take care of yourself and make a decision about how to proceed. I agree with some who have suggested the Cross House on YouTube. Oh, it would be endlessly entertaining and a steady flow of income. Then there would be a l a light less stress and a drain on your health. Perhaps get the Matfield house ready to sell put the Cross House on YouTube and then make a decision about your car and continue selling lights. Those are some of my ideas and they are based out of concern for you and your health. You are so delightful and I wish you the best and I hope you will be continuing your writing. You are so bright and capable and I think you will figure out what will be best for you. I hope putting the Cross House properties up for sale is a good idea. Maybe list all three properties and trade in your car in for a lesser. But capable car. While all three houses are in the market, you can complete the activities that you’ve described in your post and continue selling lights. That is something you can do while this is all happening. Is there a way to live in the Cross House while the other properties are listed and see which sales first maybe that will give you an influx of income and maybe reconsider the YouTube posting. Restoration of these properties is so invaluable and for others to learn from I know it’s a lot of work to do this, but while these things are being listed and perhaps sell, you’d have a source of income. YouTube would also provide a source of income and be entertaining for thousands of people you’re writing is very entertaining and I think just videoing what you’re doing is very entertaining that would provide a source of income in your blog. Best of luck to you, dearest Ross during this time of flux. Please hold on to your delightful style and creativity. This is a stressful and hard time for you and I think you should take solace in the endless devotion of all your readers who support you and applaud you for all that you do and have done.
There you are, Sandra! BIG hug!
Ross, you are a chameleon who has reinvented his life in revolutionary ways many, many times. As sad as this is, I am excited for your next reinvention. Perhaps you will sell all 3 properties and venture forth on a vintage yacht to write about the countless ways you’ve made the world a more beautiful place. Thank you for sharing your vision, your incredibly brave, hard work and your journey with all of us.
Jennifer, I want to sell the Tin House. If The Other House sells, I’ll move into the Cross House. If the latter sells, I’ll take The Other House off the market and, likely, live out my days in it.
I’ve already done the vintage yacht thing.
I can’t say more than what’s already been said by other loyal blog readers, ❤️🩹 so big hugs to you Ross.
No matter how disheartening it may seem right now, making this tough decision is itself, a (baby 😉) step toward a healthier, happier life. I think staying flexible & letting your next move depend on what happens first is a good tentative plan.
We’ve all learned so much from your posts! We’ve gained tremendous insights & inspiration not just about a house, but about nourishing an enthuisam to contribute to the beauty of the world. ✨️ To me, this is a treasure one rarely comes across.
I’ll continue to read whatever you write about, as I enjoy & often share in your various interests & ideas. I’ll be here awaiting the next post about light fixtures, or installing a tile inset somewhere, or a political posting & a kitty … always a kitty.
Here’s to less stress, better health, & an expanding view of parts unknown. 🌻
💜 Cheers, Ross! 🥂
Thank you, Kim! Big hug back!
Well, I thought maybe the shock was you were turning Republican! Thank God it wasn’t that!
That would be truly shocking, MaryCarol! Oh, the horror!
I am so sorry Ross, you saved the Cross house from death. You have to feel proud of that. I so loved doing my small part in doing some work on the beautiful old girl and searching Facebook marketplace to find cool things for her interiors.I have loved the Cross house since I was a child and it was so fun to bring parts of her back to life. The first thing I did was to restore the Round Bedroom fireplace. Turning that piece back to its former beauty gave me great joy. When I drive by her, the porch ceiling I painted always makes me smile. May she find another good steward as good as you were to continue your fine work.
Kenny! We all love you! But we’ve no idea who Ken is!
To repeat: I might not sell the Cross House in the end. It’s up to the Gods.
I certainly understand the place you find yourself in. There is a time to downsize and live a less complicated life. I am the proud owner of one of your beautiful lights and only wish I was in a position to buy another. I have truly enjoyed your posts including the clarity and courage of your political blogs. You saved a beautiful piece of American history in the Cross house and educated and inspired me and many others on the incredible history of the house, its electrics, building, homes of another era etc. It is a powerful legacy. I wish you the best possible outcome in all of this and will continue to follow your blogs. Your writing is a powerful talent and perhaps you can find more time for it once one of your homes is sold. All the best.
Ross, I have been following you for probably 10 years, but have rarely commented. I’m so sorry to hear this, although I’m not really surprised. It’s so much work. I’m only in my 50s, but I can’t imagine doing a project this large by myself!
What you’ve done is astounding, though. I will forever love you for restoring all those glorious stained glass windows. I’ve spent many a happy hour looking at the photos of them and sending you “thank you” vibes from Texas. LOL I absolutely LOVE stained glass, and it’s so damn heart-pleasing to know all of those windows were saved.
I wish you nothing but the best, and I’m still going to be reading, no matter what!
Thank you Starrla. I love your name!
Oh Ross……my heart breaks for you. I have started to write in this comment section 4 times now but tears start falling and nothing seems quite right to type.
I’ve followed you since the beginning from afar. I may have commented a few times, but I mainly loved living vicariously thru the blog updates I’d get sent to my email. In this day in age, it was one of the few emails I found joy in receiving.
I too am a immense cat lover, however my son has horrible allergies so after our last cat retired to Florida we became a dog household…..I know the horror!! So although I love my dogs I love/loved all your kitties and their stories. I would pass them onto my sister who in turn started following you, she’s renovating a old Victorian in Cleveland OH (thankfully she’s not online because it is not a “Ross Style” renovation and you’d be horrified lol but she’s saved a old gal who had been thru a lot so you still gotta love that right?!)
What you have done to the Cross house is literally our childhood dreams, we’d joke that we were gonna end up like Grey Gardens in our senior years……however as you’ve said many times, life happens….
To skip a whole lot of my life, at 42 I already have experienced the breakdown of my body and energy but not my mind that you speak of…. and it’s the hardest thing I think I’ve had to deal with.
I’m about to be celebrating 4 years since being diagnosed with stage 3 triple negative breast cancer. I’m considerer NED (no evidence of disease) they won’t say “cancer free” since it had spread to the lymph nodes on my right side and it’s a sneaky cancer. After 6 months of chemotherapy, 6 weeks daily radiation, double mastectomy, tons of additional surgeries, reconstructive surgeries etc etc my body feels 90 years old some mornings. My right arm/hand are numb and don’t do what I want sometimes. I constantly wonder if I feel like this now, what am I gonna feel like in 10 years? 20 years? What if I get cancer again??? I cannot fathom going thru that type of treatment again. With all that rambling, I’m just trying to convey that I understand the feeling of your future changing immensely from how you pictured, and the culprit being your body betraying you.
But Ross, you have lived and done what others dream of!!!! The Cross house will forever bear the touch and love of you! It doesn’t matter what’s still to be done, you’ve accomplished what others have not been able to do since she was 1st built!
This is not the end, it’s a new chapter for you both, and I myself am excited to be part of it. You’ve overcome so much in your life, this will all be ok. You have a lot of people you don’t even know rooting for you. Head up, chest out – we got this my friend 🖤
Much love from Ohio!
Oh, Carrie. Thank you for sharing your heartfelt, very personal story. My heart goes out to you.
And, yes, this is not the end, or an end. It’s just an interruption and I’ve no idea of how this chapter will develop. But, time will tell.
MASSIVE hug! Ross
Ross- Ben Kilner (channel name) has made an excellent You Tube video titled- I wish I knew this BEFORE I started- Pay, Equipment,brand deals +agents. Also Tally Ho YT channel about a sailing boat renovation shows what can be achieved. Good luck HB
I’ve never met a Havelock before! Great name!
I’ve watched every episode of Tally Ho, and posted about her. While Leo did all the video work initially, he later had to hire out a lot of the work.
Havelock, the Ben Kilner video you referenced is here.
Yes, thats it. I thought he did an excellant job of laying out the potential revenue streams from YT and others.
I’ve had to let this news settle a bit, though like others I’m not completely surprised. We are the same age, you and me, and even with good health (knock on wood) I definitely have felt the depletion of stamina these past few months. Plus, I work an active, physical job that keeps me moving! So as your posts became less frequent following your health issues, I’ve thought “he needs to stop, that place is going to kill him!”.
I have commented a few times and have loved following your journey since I grew up in the neighborhood there. First at 4th & Cottonwood then 4th & Market. I walked by the Cross House daily from Kindergarten – 6th grade on my way to William Allen White Elementary. That was A LOT of years ago, and you have her looking better than ever in my memory. It was sad to watch the decline over the years on my trips home so was thrilled to learn someone gave a damn and was going to try to resuscitate her. You’ve done that, you’ve given her a second chance.
I also “hung out” through my teens and early 20’s around Strong City and Cottonwood, there used to be a lot of dances over there! Ken’s Place, The Hole in the Wall…I still love driving through.
So I will be watching to see how the universe plays this and where life takes you. Wherever, please keep blogging!
CB
I have followed and just loved reading your posts since they began. I watched in awe at your successes and learned so much that was used as input to the renovation of my 1863 brick Victorian beauty. I too worried about how we would be able to sustain the amount of energy and money it required to continue. Then, we had to face the horrifying decision of selling her while knowing that would mean she would be demolished. Our hearts were truly broken. However, my health forced the issue and we really had no choice. Now almost 2 years later, it still smarts but I can tell you that the reduction in the stress of constant work and expenses has proven that the decision and the timing were just right. Best of luck to you and I hope the universe is kind.
I would reach out to the couple that run https://www.cheapoldhouses.com, for advice on monetizing what you have or to boost your real estate listings, they have incredible reach. Tell them a Board member from Historic Albany sent you, they are just north of us in Upstate NY. Good luck + good health!!
Thank you, Beth. COH only lists properties at $150K or under. That is less than the Cross House mortgage. So, this will not work.
How about reaching out to https://www.oldhousedreams.com/ ? Their readership would absolutely love the Cross House, and who knows, maybe one of them would buy it.
I think you are absolutely making the right decision here. While I have loved following your efforts on the Cross House (and would love to follow any of your future writing, as you do have a gift for it), it’s a huge pile of entropy to try to fight – on top of the Carriage House, your own house, and the Tin House, not to mention running a business.
Thank you, Issac. Yes, I plan to reach out to OHD.
They have a list of 250,00 and under as well. “Cheapish” Old Houses
I’m so sorry to read this, Ross. But being a few years older than you, I can understand why you need to let go. We’re having to let go of our 40 year old house and five acres, because Spousal Unit’s Parkinson’s has developed to the point he can’t do any of the maintenance. I’m constantly exhausted just trying to keep up.
We will be moving into an Independent Living apartment complex as soon as the facility opens in a few months. We have so much to let go of that it’s almost mind numbing, but we’ll get through it, and the relief of not being responsible for a mortgage, maintenance, house cleaning, paying property taxes and homeowners’ insurance, and lawn/garden care will be a huge weight off my narrow shoulders. The estate sale and property sale will be bittersweet, but better we let go of the stuff than schlock it off on our nieces and nephews, most of whom don’t live anywhere near us.
Visiting the Cross House was on my bucket list. Revisiting your blog will have to do now.
Cuddle up with the cat(s) and know that we will always appreciate what you did for the Cross House.
Dear Arkay, thank you for sharing your story.
And, as I’ve stated, I might not sell the Cross properties. It’s up to the Gods. So, you might, in the end, still have the house on your bucket list!
I’m sure all the profound and functionally helpful things have already been said, Ross.
So I will say nothing more than that you are in my beneficent thoughts. Breathe deeply. Look for the good (and you’ve done so much good! So much inspiration to others).
The Cross House is not a living being ( like a cat 😽). But it’s so much more than a building. Whatever comes next for the House, a piece of you will ever be of it. You’ve made both it, and yourself, grander, through your labors. And as the House has, in some strange way, become a “home” for all of us here: WE THANK YOU!
Pax et bonum…
Thank you, JCF.
I hope the Universe is in your favour! We are just custodians of such properties and you have done so much already to restore Cross House.
Get a few of your tech savvy friends to get that YouTube channel going and look to Patreon. Videos from now on (you’d be surprised how little actual restoration work goes into one episode of sone so small steps would be fine) You also have an excellent back catalogue of photos to show the progress so far. Volunteers with skills could well be out there. People would also love to see how you restore the vintage lighting.
Wishing you all the best x
Like many others have already commented, I am sad to read this but not really all that surprised that it has finally come to pass that you are writing this post. I sensed that this was a likely, eventual, possibility in 2021/22, but had hoped I was wrong. Having continued to follow along though since my departure three years ago, I have felt this coming for awhile.
Though you may or may not ever see the finish line, the work you HAVE accomplished during your ownership prevented the house from becoming a parking lot. Nearly every room save a few still looks like a bomb went off in it, but a lot of the “hard” work has already been done, and the (still essentially blank slate) may be attractive to someone with a creative sense of vision to swoop in. I don’t think it can be overstated enough that your efforts SAVED the house from certain destruction. Nobody else will ever finish and decorate it the way you would have (or still might), but the most dire work has already been carried out.
The Tin house in Matfield Green is exceedingly cute and quirky, and I enjoyed the trip we took there. I remember the drive as being VERY scenic. It needs a lot of work, but it could be made to be livable for not too terribly much money and effort. I am cautiously optimistic that it will probably sell for you rather quickly.
My prediction(s):
1)
When you put the big house up for sale, you will (probably) have a lot of interest at first. Lots of lookie loos but no serious offers.
The post-COVID real estate market is way, wayyyyyyyy crazy, and we may all end up surprised, but like you already suspect, I too feel that it may take a long, long-ass time for a buyer to materialize.
2)
The tin house will probably sell nearly instantly. It’s cute as all getout, and will make someone a nice project.
3)
The other house will also (probably) sell rather quickly, once/IF you are able to complete a few more items on the to-do list and get it put up for sale next year. I got the sense during my time in Kansas that Strong City is at the beginning of a rebirth, and has become (or will be) a desirable place to live again in the coming years.
4)
You will have quite a bit less trouble finding a buyer for the carriage house than the big house, and though it also is in need of quite a lot of work at this point as well, its smaller size is an advantage. After the kitchen and the bathrooms are complete, it would be a pretty livable project for someone handy. I don’t recall though – did you end up deeding the big house and the carriage house together, or can they be sold independently?
Conclusion:
I have a strong feeling that you will likely have the opportunity to call the big house “home” if the other mechanisms at work here play out in the right order. If this is the outcome you want though, the only path forward will be to immediately halt all work on the Cross properties while they are on the market save to keep the yard mowed and the windows clean, and otherwise mothball them entirely until the work required to list the other house is complete.
OR, OR,
Some glamorous out of state developer will jump at the opportunity to snatch it up and you’ll be able to wash your hands of it all pretty quickly and move on with your life.
Following up to note that you are not alone in dealing with hugely slumped sales numbers. My 9 to 5 and my ebay storefront have both recently seen a steep, sharp slowdown as well, which has left me scratching my head too. People just aren’t spending any money right now, and it’s scary.
I’m so sick of living in unprecedented times.
I blame the orange man.
I suspect things are going to be in limbo until after the results of the 2026 midterms. Depending on the outcome, things may bounce back or sink even lower, waiting for the results of the 2028 elections. Providing there is a 2028 election.
Thank you for the considered thoughts, Cody.
Yes, I halted all work on the Cross House several weeks ago. As soon as the Tin House is listed, I will begin work on The Other House. The Cross Properties will be, yes, mothballed, save for keeping the yard up, and keeping the inside clean.
My car will go up for sale this week.
As mentioned, I soooooooo don’t expect the Cross Properties to sell quickly. I plan to sell the big house and Carriage House as a package, as I plan to promote the properties as an investment opportunity (airbnb and events space). All the new plumbing in the big house was done so that each bedroom can have an en suite bathroom. The owner could live in the Carriage House!
Also as mentioned, if The Other House sells first, I will take the Cross properties off the market and move in. This will not be a surprise me. But, again, it’s all up to the gods.
The Other House has significant equity, and its sale would afford me hiring Justin to finish the interior of the Carriage House. Renting it would cut the mortgage in half. Doing its as a whole house airbnb might bring in much more. And then I would finish the Octagon Suite, and third floor of the big house, and airbnb them as well. In short, I might well be able to, at last, afford the properties.
I’m reading this all with tears streaming – been following this from the very beginning. You’ve showed me around the house on at least 2 occasions when I was in Emporia. On one of those occasions you proposed to me. I can’t tell you how much following this blog has sustained me through the last turbulent decade plus. Maybe by some stretch you can sell one of the other properties, finish the carriage house and live in it and still very slowly work on the Cross House.
Yes, Anthony, I did propose. Your charm was just so intoxicating!
Oh Ross, a friend whom I have never met. I have so enjoyed your progress on the Cross house. I have been inspired, amused, enchanted… but you must prioritize your own life. You do not owe us, your blog audience, a thing. Are we sad? Absolutely. Will we miss the journey? Absolutely. Will we rejoice that you are happier, healthier, and moving on to the next stage of your own life? Absolutely.
Much love,
Chris
Thank you, Chris.
The journey is not over, just interrupted. It may resume.
Meanwhile, I’ll still be blogging.
Much love back at ya’! Ross
Hi Ross,
I am a long-time (several years before Covid) reader of your blog (have re-read it all 3 times, including comments!). I only posted once, on your post about the Tally-Ho being launched, but I check in on your blog several times a week. The reason I don’t comment is due to the fact that I live with a chronic health condition called ME/CFS (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue Syndrome—one form of Long Covid is actually indistinguishable from this) and up to 2 years ago I had managed to be working full-time as a middle school math teacher, until my mental and physical health took a downturn (to the point my doctor and I feared I also had MS; but it turns out it’s either Fibromyalgia or Small Fiber Neuropathy on top of the ME/CFS). But this post actually prompted me to leave my bed and open my laptop in order to write my thoughts down, as they are too many to comfortably type on my phone (my usual window to the world).
I have been worried you might find yourself having to make such a decision, especially since your health scare. I too had a close brush with death (in my case a “saddle pulmonary embolism”, which kills about 2/3 of its victims, in December of 2020), and I really wanted to reach out to you then but didn’t think I had much to contribute in terms of useful advice, though my well-wishes certainly flowed your way. I will say that my mental health took a hit with this experience, combined with being a middle school teacher teaching virtually, then going back to in-person teaching and finding that everything was harder. Two years ago when I lost my job I had an acute mental health crisis, but thanks to therapy I am in a much better place. Wow, I didn’t mean to go into such detail. 🙂
In any case, I want to give your some concrete suggestions (and of course, I understand if you just decide to skip this entirely, as I know that your post is NOT asking for advice, but rather informing us of a painful decision that only you can truly know is the right one for you). However, I want to tie together some ideas others have suggested, and also add some of my own. These suggestions could be used regardless of whether you put the Cross House up for sale, or something miraculous happens and your fate changes once again (as it is wont to do).
Again, I imagine right now you are probably dealing with a great mass of mixed emotions, including mourning your unfulfilled plans, your own change in health and energy, perhaps even a weight of shame from feeling you have disappointed your fans (despite the fact that the comments make it clear that we overwhelmingly support whatever decision you make, and understand your reasoning and situation), the dread of having to yet again take stock, make plans and figure out where to go from here….and probably many other emotions.
But, as the comments prove, you have built a wonderful country-spanning (possibly world-spanning?) community through your blog and of course, locally in Emporia. All of us have been rooting for you, all of us want to help if it is within our ability, and all want what is best for you, personally, Ross (the Cross House only second). So my suggestions include involving this community to a lesser or greater extent, because WE WANT TO HELP you reach your goals, whatever they may be and however they may change as circumstances change. Among your vast group of fans (and I know many are probably like me and don’t comment at all or only rarely) there are many people with vast amounts of expertise and varied useful skills. If you combine the *desire to help* (of all) the *energy, skills, knowledge, and means to do so effectively* (of many), and your local community’s *investment in the success* of your originally Quixotic ambition, you have a potent mix.
What Covid and my mental health journey have taught me is that *the vast majority of people want to help* and that *they find deep satisfaction found in helping*. We can’t all save the world, but every single small action that adds beauty or heals, as you often say yourself, makes the world a better place. And humans have a strong drive to do so, but we often have a hard time finding an outlet and sustaining that desire.
If, as is very natural, you don’t want to read any more advice and suggestions, do skip the following! But perhaps, if you read this (now or in the future when you are more emotionally ready to do so), you may find that some of these suggestions are helpful.
Regardless, always wishing you the very best in life, Ross, and thanking you for sharing your wonderful journey and the lessons to be found in it,
Your Mexican-Canadian fan in Austin, TX.
Cynthia
SUGGESTIONS
(apologies for the wordiness—conciseness has never been my strong point)
1. MONEY PART 1: PATREON
Start a Patreon (and/or Kofi?) account. I know you have a GoFundMe link, and I have donated a bit in the past, but the thing about Patreon (I’m not sure how Kofi works, so that’s something to investigate) is that people can sign up for monthly contributions, giving you a more-or-less predictable stream of income, however small.
Yes, I should have been giving to your GoFundMe, but it’s hard for me to remember to do things like that (brain fog is one of the issues with my illness).
I would sign up for a $20 a month. I wish it could be more. But if everyone who can afford it gives $1, $2, $5, $10, $15, $20 a month, then that could add up to a not negligible amount. Now, I think all or most of your fans would agree that we don’t need “tier perks” for the different monthly donations. It is just a means of having those of us who wish to help and have the financial means, however small, to do so on a sustained and sustainable way.
2. MANAGER:
Many of your fans are retired (or like me, unable to work full time), or have time to donate. Find one or two trustworthy fans with strong experience in management/organization to help you manage all the different aspects of your many projects/goals as well as to organize some of my suggestions further down, if you decide to implement them. This person (or people) could work remotely, and it will take some effort on your part to do due diligence, vet anyone offering to do this, and figure out how best to implement such a situation, but I do think having one or two people tracking information, communicating with fans, perhaps even setting up a special email account for fans that bypasses you so that they can keep things ticking along without adding to your burden. It may also be a good idea to see if someone who has financial planning expertise (and is properly vetted) can either advise on occasion or also be part of the team to help you research, run numbers and make decisions based on the latest data.
3. SOCIAL MEDIA OUTREACH:
Several people have suggested YouTube and other social media platforms. I think YouTube takes a lot of knowledge of editing, pacing, filming, etc. (and equipment!). But perhaps you have fans with knowledge of social media who could manage an instagram account (using your blogs as a starting point, say), or even make occasional TikTok/YouTube shorts about the Cross House (again, using your blogs as a starting point). Or, perhaps some *local* fan would be interested in creating posts (either photos and text for Instagram, or short videos for TikTok and YouTube shorts). However, this should be done in a way that it does *NOT* add to your burden in any major way. Hence getting a manager comes first!
4. MONEY PART 2: REAL ESTATE.
This is something that may be obvious and somewhat silly, and that you have already thought of and discarded, but: Have you talked to your realtor about selling your “Tin House” and/or your current house as is? And if so, how does the money you might expect from such a sale (assuming your realtor thinks they would sell in a reasonable span) compare to what you’d make if you finish fixing them up as you plan, taking into account your time, energy, effort, money, taxes, insurance, etc.? It is very easy to fall into the “sunk cost fallacy”, as you know, so I think giving these numbers and factors a good hard look if you haven’t done so recently might be worth while.
5. HARNESSING YOUR COMMUNITY:
Beyond what I have already outlined, I think you can really harness your *very willing* fan base. I keep thinking of the Tally-Ho and how Leo had several periods where volunteers from all over came to help on some of the more massive undertakings (cutting all the boat’s ribs from the white oak planks, e.g.). And barn-raisings. And even my experience in college with a Providence RI organization similar to Habitat for Humanity, called “Stop Wasting Abandoned Property”: In one day a group of 20 untrained volunteers, supervised by knowledgeable and experienced leaders, put up the framing of the entire first and second stories of a house being build. I remember being given a measuring tape and a pencil and clear instructions at one point. A bit later, I was taught how to use a circular saw to cut joists to length.
So, with the help of your manager(s) organize a day-long or even week-long project where people can come help with the current most urgent project. These groups would be supervised by yourself and by your experienced volunteers and trusted, knowledgable collaborators. These supervisors would be paid for their labor in training and supervising these groups, and the coordination and task assignment (based on skills, ability, knowledge, etc.) and sequence of sub-projects would be set up by your manager, in consultation with you and your trusted “inner team” (thinking of Dr Doug, the Justins, other contractors, etc.).
What I am envisioning is:
Some projects would be ongoing or piece-meal, done by local fans.
Others would be large projects: Fans from further away may volunteer to come help; others may be able to help from afar (social media, publicity, research and sourcing materials, organization, etc.)
Each large “barn raising” project is organized over the course of several weeks:
– you, manager and relevant members of the “inner team” outline goals, sub-projects and tasks and needed tools and materials, as well as sequence and expected time to do different tasks or sub-projects. Safety of all and safeguarding your properties and contents are taken into account. Some volunteer positions should include making and providing snacks, lunch, and plenty of water
– call for volunteers is sent out via blog, word-of-mouth, and, if available, social media. Also, reach out to the local college or any civic organization that regularly volunteers with other community projects.
– volunteers sign up and include availability, any relevant skills, experience or knowledge, and any limitations (but no one is turned away).
– Manager groups the volunteers for times/dates based on availability and skill set.
– Publicity volunteers: Artistic-leaning volunteers could make up posters/bookmarks/postcards (whatever works best) for putting up locally (as well as digitally in social media), and other local volunteers could print and post them around town and in nearby towns, in order to drum up more support and volunteers.
– Pre-barn-raising volunteers: make lists of materials, source them at good prices, pick up and deliver any that aren’t shipped, source any tools that may be needed (yours, leased, borrowed or loaned), clearly label materials and tools with all relevant information and organize them in a logical clear fashion at the job site *before* the actual “barn-raising”
– The day (or days) of a project you will need some volunteers helping the manager (who may be participating virtually) keep everything running smoothly, ensuring everyone is safe and there is a central source to answer questions or resolve issues that come up.
– Besides the “feed and hydrate” group, anyone with first aid or medical training should be known and perhaps wear something to identify them if needed.
– If you do get volunteers from further away, some local fans could help by housing them.
– Post-barn raising volunteers can help with clean-up, organizing left-over materials, returning borrowed or leased tools and equipment, and even with writing thank-you notes!
LIST OF PROJECTS.
Some are ongoing, some could be done simultaneously if you have enough volunteers and qualified supervisors/trainers/etc.
1. Completing the Carriage House renovation.
If I am correct it where this project is, I think this is one that *could be done* in single “barn-raising” lasting a couple of days plus some contractor’s work outside of a “barn-raising” project. I list this first because you could then immediately put the Carriage House up for rent, or possibly even for sale. Or, if you plan on selling your own house after all, you could then move in there while the other properties go on sale.
2. Preparing the basement and attic for your lamps and other work paraphernalia
*If you decide to sell your current house*. This might include making shelves, adding work lights and outlets (so if any volunteers are retired electricians….)
3. Completing the necessary cat-fence and cat-yard work and the pond for your goldfish.
*If you decide to sell your current house*.
4. Moving your lamps to the Cross House and moving your other belongings to the Carriage House and/or the Cross House as needed.
*If you decide to sell your current house*.
5. Tin House or Your own house.
Depending on how much work needs to be done, and what kind of work it is,
the order of these two undertakings, and how many “barn-raising” days are needed, would have to be determined by yourself and the manager (who will help you by first getting a very clear idea of the scope of each, and then can research the cost and time needed for each).
The goal is to complete this work with a solid quality of workmanship but saving you money (volunteers could in this instance help you source salvaged materials, materials on sale, etc., or use their knowledge to help you find cheaper ways to solve certain problems (though you are already very good at that yourself!)).
If you decide to sell the Cross House and remain in your current house then you may also consider what could be done to make your business easier on you (new storage, organization, etc.)
6. Cross House yardwork & maintenance (cleaning windows, etc.).
Rather than a group “barn-raising” this could be a regular volunteer gig if someone local was willing to take it on.
7. Cross House exterior painting:
You need volunteers to help you build scaffolds and borrow necessary equipment, and you would likely want to train the painters on how to do it to your standards, but perhaps this is something that could be done as one single “barn-raising”. This could include reviewing parts that are already painted and making necessary repairs and re-painting where needed.
8. Cross House Porte-Cochère and the front porch: remaining details to be fixed, painted, repaired, etc.
9. Cross House interior projects: this would likely only be undertaken once everything else is done, perhaps with the house already up for sale if that is what you decide to do.
Well, I think that is all for now. Certainly a long post.
Cynthia! I’m gobsmacked at how much effort you put into your comment! You are a treasure! MASSIVE hug! Ross
Wow. Great list and great plan.
Hi Cynthia M, excellent points. Kudos to you for sharing your ideas and energy (ME/CFS). Thank you. May you have a lovely day.
Dearest Ross,
I have been reading your blog since 2015 or 2016 when I hit a hard patch in my life. When I came across the title, I thought “Restoring Ross” meant it was about restoring you! But I was especially delighted to find out that is was about restoring Cross House and I became a daily reader of your h blog ame Old House Dreams, while going through that protracted tough time. I think you saved me.
I am a wannabe architect and I have always wanted to restore a house. I got to do that through you. I think I have read every post and commented numerous times.
My birthday is also in February and I will be 75. So I totally get it. Nothing is the same. I have lost friends, my dog, the 108 year old house across the street burned to the ground in June (thankfully no one was home and no one was hurt), my best friend has dementia…a lot of loss, and being almost 75 is different than being 55…
But. We must go on. We must enjoy every day. We need to deal with the changes.
I hope that fellow or I win the lottery or some miracle happens for you. But if it doesn’t, I understand. Change happens.
You built a wonderful community and you are very loved. I have your book. I tell my friends about your blog and how wonderful and inspirational it is.
Tonight I had a feeling something was up with you. And I came and looked.
I thank you for the healing, help and hope you have given me and many others. I wish you every happiness. Let’s go for the ride and see what comes.
Please keep writing.
With much love and big hugs…
Karen
Thank you, Karen!
Ross,
As others have said, as soon as I read the title of this post, I had a sinking feeling about its content. While your decision makes perfectly logical sense for a variety of reasons, it’s sad to see this chapter potentially come to an end. Whatever happens, I’m glad that I finally got to make a pilgrimage to the Cross House last year and see all the work that you’ve already accomplished! That work–and this incredible blog–is a legacy and will remain as a testament to your rare combination of skill, vision, and dedication.
Brian! And it was a total delight meeting you! Much love, Ross
Hi Ross,
Dave from Portland Maine.
I understand how hard it was to have to sit down and think things out now that you are getting older and things are changing.
I am just going to toss this out. You are a gifted craftsman who understands detail and history. You would make a fine teacher. Not sure how you would or could do this. What if you gave lessons in renovation of historical homes and charge people to come to the Cross house to stay for a few weeks and you give workshops and train folks on certain projects? You would have help; you could train the next generation of restorers. also, having day long seminars on the projects you have completed for a fee to help folks with the pitfalls of restoration. Just a thought.
I admire you and what you have done to save the Cross house from becoming a casualty of time and rot. Sincerely, David
Thank you, David.
I totally understand your decision, having first met my own limitations just 2 years ago at 76, when I decided to move back to New York. This is a very difficult and heart rending realization for you and clearly your readers and fans – of which I am one, dear Ross – are with you 100%. I hope we continue to hear from you about whatever house reno achievements you make as well as politics and cats. Yes, please, cats.
I’m very saddened by the news that you will have to sell the Cross House before you finish working on it. But I hope you can feel that your work on it is a major accomplishment. Obviously, you were the steward that the former owner believed you would be. You brought it forward, you honored it, you cared for it with love and intelligence. And you shared the process, vividly, with all your readers. And, from the bio you’ve shared, this recent project was only one in a whole series of adventurous lives. I was struck by something another commenter said: “having the courage to accept that selling might be necessary—before it ever gets to the bank—is an act of strength, not defeat.” Maybe at this point you’ll be able to enjoy being without the pressure of this huge task, being lazier, devoting yourself to other, less arduous interests. In any case, I hope no self-reproach, and I hope things go as easily as possible, and that some of the suggestions your readers have made will turn out to work. I’m so grateful for everything you’ve shared (and I enjoy thinking of myself—way older than you—as Slow-Motion-me). Many, many, many good wishes.
Thank you, Slow-Motion Myra.
I have no idea if I will, in the end, sell the Cross Properties. If the house I live in sells first, I’ll take the Cross properties off the market and move in. As I’ve said, it’s up to the Gods. I’m just along for the ride!
I also have no sense of self-reproach. Rather, I feel great pride in what I’ve accomplished. I did what????????
Very glad, no self-reproach.
Take a breath, Ross , and step back.
I think you are slightly depressed. And physically tired. (You push yourself too hard.)
I’m not making light of anything. But I think you’re living a perfect storm of finances and mental and physical exhaustion.
I think selling the Tin House is a great option. I know I would rather buy a clean slate with the upgrades you made rather than have to demolish and renovate a kitchen and bathroom and deal with electrical and plumbing. Before you list it for the $22,500 you put into it check some comps. You might be able to sell it for more. You just missed the best window to sell, summer. July and August is often when people move, because of the school year, but still not too late. If there are no comps ask for $35,000 and then take any offers above the $22,500 you want.
Once you sell the now depreciated Toyota Hybrid and then replace it, will it even be worth it? Back burner. You’ll be lucky to break even.
Your current house. It is darling and I would hate to see you lose it but you own THREE properties. You need one. So it’s your MCM or the Cross property. Choose one to live in.
How much can you get for the MCM and how much do you need to get the Cross House habitable enough to move in? Cat fence, koi pond, kitchen and bathroom.
It is a toss up which will sell faster and which will bring in more money. That’s on you to do the homework as to what each is worth in the current market, which will sell faster and which will bring in more money.
I don’t recall where you are storing all of your lighting business but if it is in a storage facility you are paying for, then move it all to the Cross House and that eliminates an expense.
I know it would be a strain on your time but I think those that have suggested YouTube might be on the right track. You need two channels. One for your lighting business and one for the Cross House. You can start with your phone and some free editing software. Take us through the magic you do renovating your lights from start to finish. The before, during and after. Then you can provide a link to the finished restoration for purchase. You might sell more lights that way, reach a wider audience. I am addicted to a furniture restoration channel. I’d buy those pieces if he wasn’t in Estonia.
Then a channel for the Cross House. Every time you do something. film it for a while so you have some footage to edit. You can speed up the repetitive tedious parts. But showing the door before, process and door after, the studs before and the dry wall after, etc. You would be surprised how many people find this stuff interesting. I am following quite a few YouTube channels of ordinary people, some not so young, renovating derelict properties. The Cross House is in much better shape than what I am watching. Don’t sweat a schedule. You don’t have to post every week.
Once you get a following, register with Patreon and offer exclusive content or previews before public release. Sign up for the cup of coffee thing. Every little bit helps. But I really think reducing your expenses and trying the YouTube thing might help you get through this.
I’m 70. I just spent the last year reclaiming my yard from 10 years of neglect and overgrowth; the back was literally half overgrown rose suckers and invasive Matilija poppies, plus bricks taken up and a trench dug through my patio to replace a gas line. Overgrowth all gone and patio repaired. Tomorrow I will put the finishing touches on a cast iron bench I have repainted and made new wooden slats for. Looks good as new. I’ve already done a table and chair I rescued for free from the alley. I put a new seat on the chair and I only need to buy a round glass table top for the table and I’ll have al fresco dining in my back yard. I’m not working 10-12 hour days but I put in a few hours every day by just stepping out the kitchen door. I think your commute might also be wearing on you physically and mentally. If you only had one house to work on you would save the drive and it would be easier to take a break. More accomplished in less time.
So you need to decide if you are going to live in your cute MCM or put in a little more work and live in the Cross House permanently. I will say the plus to the Cross House is not only the storage and work space for your business but you have the Carriage House for additional income as a rental or AirBNB. Income property.
Anyway, not sure if you wanted any advice but there you have it.
BTW at 70 I decided to fast track some of the things I want to do, especially now that the energy credit is expiring Dec 31 instead of 2032. I’ve taken out a HELOC. (I’m betting interest rates will go up, not down and inflation will run away.) I’ll be installing a mini-split HVAC combo in my bedroom, guest room and the living space, replacing the fence, rebuilding the pergolas, repainting the house, replacing the garage door, pollarding my Sweet bay Laurel and possibly adding even more solar panels since energy is going up too. I already have solar so adding panels shouldn’t be that costly. Also replacing the refrigerator before Dec 31 for more tax credits and hiring a bit of help to haul away stuff because I’m not as young as I used to be. I’ll get as much done as I can with the HELOC because I would like to enjoy my house for a while before I die. My mortgage will be paid off when I am 82 and the HELOC when I am 85. I’m hoping to be done with my entire list within 5 years, giving me 20 year to enjoy my house. For me, that is worth it. No penalty for paying it off early, which I can do once my mortgage is paid off.
Hope you are feeling better and have made some decisions moving forward. For me, if I wake up feeling great I made the right choice. If I have a bad night and wake up feeling down and depressed, I made the wrong choice. I know you’ll figure this out.
You seem to be in a better state of mind now. That’s good.
From your long post about your state of finances, it is now clear to me that your situation is one of being house rich but cash poor. I live in Vancouver BC, one of the most expensive real estate markets in the world. It is very common here for a person our age or older to live in a house with a $two million or much more market value but with an ordinary pension income. When you add the additional houses that you are carrying without any income supporting them, you are in the same situation. It has always bothered me that you didn’t have the Carriage House rented out.
I’m not clear on where you are living, are you paying rent somewhere else as well?
You haven’t said anything about it, but I think you are spending a lot of time driving. You have three houses in three towns plus a business in another location that requires almost daily attendance.
I assume that you are also paying rent for your lighting business. You once posted that you thought you could run the business from the third floor Cross House space.
My understanding of your progress with the Cross House is that you have basically finished the main floor including a very nice kitchen large enough to produce a gourmet meal for several people. On the second floor, the bedrooms and bathrooms are ready to finish.
I know you did a lot of work on the Carriage House. I thought you were about to rent it out. What is its status now?
You have decided that you can reduce your auto expenses quickly with a smaller but adequate vehicle.
You haven’t actually asked for advice from your friends and readers, but I am about to give my recommendations because I and people I know have been through similar situations. I wish someone had given me the kind of advice I’m about to give you when I had a similar state of affairs.
I think you have already set most of the required changes in motion, so I hope this will will help clarify your thoughts and give you confidence going forward.
So, here it is:
This is based on some assumptions that could be wrong, so some of this might need to be changed.
Your goal, as I understand from your writing over the years, is to have a retirement income from a personal business that you enjoy running. You originally intended to run a B&B in the Cross House. You have shown that you have the skills and personality to run a B&B successfully. Not an Air B&B. The difference is that AirB&B is mostly a hotel alternative whereas an actual B&B is hosted and includes a nice or even deluxe, sociable, hosted breakfast. To this end, you should read some books of the ‘so you want to run a B&B’ business advice type. This should be your Plan A.
My analysis of your situation is that since there is no obvious quick way to increase your income, then you need to reduce expenses.
First, downsizing you car expenses is a very good first step. Next, cut down on the amount of time you spend driving.
I think you should commit to this and don’t list the Cross House right away. You are already about to commit to getting the other houses ready for sale.
First offload the excess real estate. Inflation has been good for your sales price, it’s time to capture that value. The additional properties are distracting you from Plan A. They are a drain on your financial resources and time. They add more driving time to your life. Drive time is non-productive and an expense. The worry they cause is not worth whatever they might have in future potential. Let someone else have an opportunity with them.
The assumption here is that they are saleable in reasonable time. I have the vague idea that you are living in the Strong House. If so, rent it out behind you as long as you can get a rent that nets some positive cash flow. This is faster than selling and does not give a huge chunk of your sale proceeds to sale costs.
There are ways to move real estate in a slow market and also improve your financial situation after the sale.
If you want ideas on improving your sales speed and financial results, ask me for more info, the details are not that interesting for most readers here.
Next, you already have the lighting business, and although it is in crisis now, it is not a terminal situation. If you can carry it forward without actually spending money to support it, you can tough it out until it picks up. The customers you were expecting have not gone away, they are waiting until they feel able to spend money on what is, after all, a luxury item that can wait. Those sales are still out there and will come in eventually. When is a big question we can’t predict.
My recommendation is to go into a holding pattern but if the economy becomes worse, keep an eye out for deeply discounted additions to your inventory.
Next, I recommend that while business is slow you take the opportunity to move it into the Cross House third floor.
Assumptions here are that the inventory is a manageable size in physical and inventory cost carried basis. Also, that the business is not locked into a lease you can’t get out of.
You still need a place to live. Where are you living now?
I thought you were living in the Cross House. If so get the Carriage house rented out, or move into it yourself.
The result of all these moves will get all your interests in one place. You will have less distractions and substantially improve your cash flow. Once you have stopped losing money you can concentrate on getting the B&B running.
The biggest obstacle I see is the time needed to get back to a positive cash flow. You can only raise so much money by selling off excess assets. That cash has to carry you until you increase your income.
To this end, I recommend that do the absolute minimum renovation work on the other properties and concentrate on Plan A.
I recommend that you get the guest rooms in the Cross House ready for use. You do not have to run a full scale B&B operation or have continuous bookings. Just get a start on learning the business and get some money coming in. You don’t have to do all the work involved yourself, find someone in town who does housekeeping work and have them come in as needed. If you want to add breakfasts, get a cook or caterer to come in on the days needed. The important thing is to get a start on your path to your goal. This why I suggest reading some ‘how to run a B&B business’ books.
Finally, you are the person on the spot, you are best positioned to prioritize which moves will get some income coming in.
Your alternative is Plan B. This is the one to let fate determine what happens by waiting to see what sells first. I’ll let you decide what are the benefits and risks of that plan. It should be an easy exercise as you don’t have any control of how that proceeds.
For the long term future, keep in mind that you know an incredible amount about restoring old houses. You could give presentations on the history of Lincresta and how to restore it. The same sort of thing about the history and restoration of dual gas/electric lighting fixtures. Or old servant annunciator systems. Restoring those old gas fireplaces. How to research old wallpaper. Repair those hidden rain gutter systems. How to create a ceiling with a pattern like the one in the parlour of the Cross House. You could put on weekend hands-on workshops and have the participants stay at the B&B in the Old Cross House that you used to own.
Oh. Oops. I guess I’m giving away what I want you to do. I happen to think it’s also the best future for you.
Stick to Plan A.
With Restoring love,
David
Hi, David.
Golly!
You might enjoy this post.
Wow. I can’t imagine how difficult it was, to write this post (much less, click “send”).
As someone who has followed this blog (the only blog I read, honestly – not since it’s very beginning, but shortly thereafter) and, as someone who has had the great pleasure to see both houses in all their grandeur, in person, I’m heartbroken. You were so very gracious to spend, literally, the day with Vicki and I. You lost five hours of work you could have been doing, and I felt a little guilty when we left (I don’t think I told you that). But, I was gobsmacked by the Cross properties, from the moment I climbed out of the car. Both houses were bigger, grander, more imposing (yet still had a cozy-charm to them) than I could have ever imagined. Seeing areas still awaiting your hand and vision were equally as captivating as those that had been restored.
I understand your plight (especially, in THESE times!), and I like that you’ve figured out multiple scenarios to get through it. If that’s not meant to be, I’m glad to have met you. You’ve been an inspiration! Positive vibes your way, that they will result in a way for you to continue this endeavor (AND, find that special someone!). I truly believe you are meant to be the caretaker!
Thank you Bill for your kind words.
Y’all can meet Bill and Vicki here.
Hi
Like others I’m not surprised but sad that you might not be able to finish the Cross house reno. I have spent many hours reading your blog and even comment a few times, you even made a question of mine a post. I hope everything is working out and plan to keep reading the blog as long as possible.
However the fate be, we love you Ross. Thank you. (Big hug)
I have been for lack of a better term absolutely obsessed with the Cross house for many years. Started following you shortly after you bought it. I definitely understand the reasoning for wanting to sell and wish, so very deeply wish I could be the next steward… but that would take an act of god for lack of a better term lol. Wish you the very best in your next journey!
What a complete delight to finally meet you, Braeden!
Dear Ross, I am sending you all my sympathies. I have been an avid reader for years, and as many wrote it before me, you’ve been an inspiration. I got acquainted with you on OHD, and then followed your restoration adventure. It has been fascinating. I have loved reading you too, your telling, your words, your humour. I perfectly (and kinda expected) your decision regarding the Cross House. May one or the other of your houses sell and help you keep on with your life in a more relaxed & peaceful way.
Aurélie, from accross the pond (Loire Valley, France)